My grandfather Emerik, my mother Doris and the debt I carry in my heart

I am in the seventh decade of my life and the more time leans toward old age, the stronger I am drawn to my roots. After the loss of my mother the last thread that connected me to the past, to the precious stories of my family, was broken. It is hard to accept the pain my mother carried. The wounds that were formed at a time when the unimaginable happened. She was one of the victims of the postwar period, when history unjustly punished the innocent.

But there was also a time before the tragedy. My mother often spoke about the beautiful moments of her childhood. About carefree walks through the streets of Ljubljana, about the joy she felt in her home. Ljubljana was her world. Her father, my grandfather Emerik Mayer, was a wealthy wholesaler of Austrian descent who created a warm and safe home for his family.

Between 1937 and 1938 he built the famous department store on the corner of Wolfove ulice and Hribarjevega nabrežja, today known as Mayerjeva hiša or spodnja Nama. That building was not only a business space but also a refuge for our family.

When my mother told me about growing up in Ljubljana, even as a child I imagined it all as a colorful fairy tale. But that fairy tale did not have a happy ending. Every time she finished the story, a deep sadness washed over her face. At that time I did not understand why. I only saw her eyes, full of pain.

When I grew up and understood the world better, my mother revealed the truth that marked my life. After the end of World War II the communist authorities arrested my grandfather, despite the testimonies of his employees that he helped partisan families and supported the Osvobodilno fronto. In 1945 he was tortured and shot on Pohorju.

Through my mother’s account and her suffering I felt the energy of my grandfather. He was a man who believed in people and respected them. He thought that success is genuine only if his employees grow with it. That value, which my mother passed on to me indirectly, also marked my business path.

But the injustice did not end there. In addition to losing her father, my mother experienced exile. After the war she, together with her mother and sister, was driven into Italy. On the way they were robbed of their dignity and exposed to horrors she did not want to speak about. She had to live with all those images for the rest of her days.

Yet my mother was a fighter. She had immeasurable inner strength that helped her build a new life. Her beauty and exceptional intelligence took her into a completely different world. She became miss Caprija and married prince Giovannijem Pignatellijem della Leonessa. My brother Luigi and I were born. On the surface her life seemed surrounded by luxury, but the truth was different. Only we knew about her internal struggles, about the demons of the past that would not let her be at peace.

A moment of hope came. She participated in and helped the country to the best of her ability during the process of osamosvajanja Slovenije. She managed to achieve the denationalization of the family property that had been unjustly taken from us. My grandfather was Austrian, but he stood by the Slovenians, just as my mother stood by them at the time of osamosvojitev.

Just when she thought that the injustices of the past would at least be partly corrected, she found herself in a difficult situation again. She trusted people who were not worthy of it. I trusted them too. I was convinced that the legal system protects against manipulation and greed, but I was wrong.

My mother is no longer with us, but I continue her fight. I feel that I owe it to her. And I owe it to myself. I want to bring this story to a close. I will do everything to repair what was once destroyed – above all the trust in the goodness of people.

My grandfather suffered a great injustice. My mother did as well. I do not want this pain to be passed on to my children. I want to tell them the family story once and for all, a story that will have its happy and just ending. An ending that will bring peace. An ending that will put a smile on a face and warm the heart.

That is why I do all that I do.